Tag Archives: New York City

Religion and Lemons

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Not too long ago – on good old g-chat – I was reminded of my first trip to Southern California.  This is something I was able to experience because my father commutes between the East and West coast for work.  Now there are so many things that I love about this area and I’m tempted to rehash the entire trip – however – I won’t.  Two things happened on that particular trip that will remain with me for the rest of my life.  For that reason, I am sharing them with you.

For the majority of the trek, I was with a modest group of six occasionally picking up or losing a person along the way.  One member insisted that we make a specific stop by the Anza-Borrego Desert State Park.  Our trip, strategically planned of course, was during the one time of year that the Ocotillo Cactus was supposed to be in full bloom (an apparent rare must-see).

Now being able to make some recommendations to you – if you are ever in this park, one thing you must do is go on a hike.  Just trust me.  In my opinion, this park is a prime example of why California is one of the world’s great wonders.  At the base of the trail, it may be nearly 80 degrees and by the time you reach your summit the earth is crisp beneath your feet because the temperature has dropped to a freezing 30 degrees.  Because California is so expansive the terrain is pretty diverse ranging from lush greens to desert – Southern CA being the desert portion.  I’m drawn to the desert not only because it’s beautiful but also because it’s so different from where I grew up (in upstate New York) and also from where I live now in New York City.

The night before our hike, we cooked out at a family friends weekend home not too far from the park and discussed a list of must-sees for the next day.  The borregos (or rams) of course, the ocotillo cactus and their flowers, the “white angel” marking in the canyon (which I will explain in a moment), and the oasis!  After talking all night about the packed day ahead of us – we could hardly sleep.

In the morning we took a short drive to a cute diner for breakfast.  On the way, I couldn’t get over how drenched the air was with the most amazing smells, each surpassing the one before it (if that was even possible!).  Rosemary lined the restaurant as hedging instead of your average evergreen.  Now, this is not common in New York and extremely exciting to a city girl, so I grabbed a few sprigs, wrapped them in a cloth to dry and saved them for later use.  We gobbled down our breakfast, hopped in our car and were en-route to the park but the smells kept coming.  Even though we were in the desert the scenery was beautiful and not what I had originally expected.  We passed fields and fields of citrus trees.  As we motored down the streets, the sweet smell of lemons and oranges flooded into the car.  This was moment number one for me.  I spun around in my seat and grabbed firmly onto the headrest behind me.  To this day, I can still remember squinting to see through the dust our car was tossing into the air… look at all those LEMONS!

“STOP!”  I actually yelled out loud in the car!  I had startled my father who was driving and he slowly pulled over to the side of the road.  ”Can we pick those???”  Our friends who we were following (and were the locals) also slowed down and stopped their car because they noticed we had pulled over.  We all collectively decided that no one would notice if we picked a handful and headed on our way.  (Yes, I know this was probably a bad thing we did… but it was oh, so amazing!)  I got out of the car, paused, and took the deepest breath I could.

This was the best smell I had ever experienced in my entire life.  I looked up and there was not one single cloud in the sky at that moment – it was perfect.  My face was catching the sunlight and it felt warm against my skin.  I felt so – happy.  That was what joy felt like.

I was quick with the lemons, after all I was taking them from the side of the road and this could be a tricky situation.  I dove back into the car and back towards the park we went.  Now it was time to see the ocotillo.  I do admit, they were beautiful.  This is also the portion of the trip where we saw the “white angel”, which is also note-worthy.  The story goes, the settlers used to use the “white angel” (which is just a marking on the rocks in this part of the canyon) as a guide when they were passing through.  I think that’s kind of beautiful.  I did see the marking – though I struggled to make the connection between the shape of the marking and an angel – I still like the story.  Now finally, we continued on our hike through the park.  Borregos – Check.  Photo documentation – Check.  Final destination - the oasis.

 

There are several different trails that you can take through the park depending on how far you want to hike and your experience level, we chose an intermediate level trail that was mostly following along small streams.  This was great fun for me because there were TONS of opportunities for great pictures!  My favorite picture actually took some hunting – because I had to follow “the noise” to find my subjects.  I could hear running water and I could hear a faint croaking – but I had no idea where it was coming from.  I would move closer to the water but the movement of the stream would drown out the noise I was searching for.  Back and forth, I searched and searched for a solid 15 minutes.

Starting to become frustrated, I began to climb over, under, and around boulders looking for the source of this noise – and FINALLY I found it.  There were dozens of tiny little frogs!  They were so adorable.  I know, not a word most people would use to describe frogs, but I loved them.  They were tiny and loud and piled on top of each other… wonderful.  I felt like I had discovered something magical.  I also knew that they were huddling near the water.  The stream we had been following was getting bigger, which meant that we were getting close to the oasis.  We hiked for probably another 45 minutes before we finally reached it.

Getting to the oasis in the middle of the desert was my second “moment”.  The land surrounding you is dry, barren, and uncomfortably hot – but once you’re inside you’re in a totally different world.  It’s cooler, there are lush palm trees, pools of water – it’s truly amazing.  The endorphin kick from the hike is in full swing and you’re completely isolated to reflect in one of the world’s most beautiful places.  It’s like finding your religion.

 

Life doesn’t get much better than that.  

Rutabagas, pummelos, and chayote squash.

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Is it okay to be selfish?  We are taught by our parents to share our toys, to serve dinner to our friends first, always spare someone else’s feelings (this is the one time lying is sometimes acceptable – we are talking about white lies here).  So, when does the time come to put our own needs first?  How do you figure out what you like and want if you’re worrying – constantly – about everyone else?  These questions (and their answers) lead me to believe that it is sometimes necessary to be selfish in order to find your passion.

I want to seize an entire day – heck an entire weekend – to chase my interests, and go wherever it may lead me.  Others can follow my lead; they may join along in my plans – but they are indeed my plans.  

Why is it then that coming up with a weekend’s worth of plans completely on my own is a bit like being hung to dry by my toenails?  It’s scary, almost painful, but sure to teach me a lesson.

Let’s picture it…

Saturday.

I would appreciate sleeping to start things off, though not past 9:45AM.  Sleeping much later really wastes a good portion of your day.   To follow this up – an immediate Starbucks run and a walk to the East River – dog and camera in tow.  Approximately two Venti refills later, a couple hours of walking, dog parking, and picture snapping I would circle my way back to my apartment and take approximately 30-40 minutes to take a shower.  My logic here is simple: when I decide to take my sweet time listening to loud music, windows open (winter or summer) eating yogurt and dropping clothes one piece at a time all over my apartment… it’s going to take a while.  AND if this is my day… I will be practicing my “moves” during the whole ordeal; not to worry folks… I usually justify my routine by labeling it exercise, so we’re all good!

Now, after I’ve cleaned myself up, it is time for the rest of my day – and oh, the possibilities… I have half left!  I believe I would like to dedicate a good portion of that time to the Union Square Farmer’s market.  This is a great set up on the Lower East Side – local farmers and vendors, fresh produce, everything is outside… excellente

City Harvest also gets volunteers to collect leftover produce that the local farmers/vendors weren’t able to sell over the weekend to charity.  Now, it doesn’t get any better than that.

I would most definitely try my hardest to swing a small volunteer gig into “my” weekend.

After the  ”shop ’til I drop”  experience at the market and most likely struggling to carry home vast amounts of fruits, vegetables, and handmade soap… mmm, soap…  I would lug it all back up into my apartment to create a new concoction.  I find, one of my guilty pleasures is to create a new meal based around a item I’ve never had before.  Bring on the rutabagas, pummelos, and chayote squash…  My absolute favorite thing to buy from the market: an assortment basket of hot peppers - chilies, jalapenos, habaneros… everything tastes better spicy.  Insert stomach of steel jokes here.  I’ve earned them!

Thoroughly satisfied with my fresh meal – on my day – I would go (with or without company) to a movie of my choice.  Sometimes, it is almost better to go to a movie alone.  Now call me crazy – but no one can tease you for freaking out if you are scared or laughing at inappropriate moments if you are there in the privacy of your own company.

Sunday Funday.

Sunday is go-to-the-park-day; the park of choice being of course Central Park.  So – on this very special weekend… (weather permitting) camera, dog, journal, kindle, and snacks packed up – it would be off to the park.  I really could waste hours ( upon hours…) at the park.  I love to watch people, in the non-I’m-about-to-chop-you-up-and-put-you-in-my-freezer sort of way, of course.  I helps me write, think, paint, photograph, it helps pretty much do everything.  I don’t know if that is because it is one of the quietest places in Manhattan?  Or if because it is some of the “freshest” air?  Nevertheless, I’ve found this ritual to be most enjoyable alone as well.

With other people I feel compelled to fulfill a mission or end in a particular destination.  I feel constantly pushed as if in a “hurry up and wait” mentality where my company’s presence shoves me one beat off what would be a perfectly syncopated rhythm.

Alone – I am free to snap photos, walk the dog, sketch, and read anything from best sellers to bargain books.

I’m not completely sure why – but being outside all day is satisfying yet draining.  By the time evening sets in I would most definitely have my mind zeroing in on real food, more specifically homemade pizza, and a bottle of red wine.  All consumed in the safety of my porch.  Twinkling holiday lights are lit year round and set a peaceful ambiance.  My cheeks warm from wine, my muscles loose, my hair still wet from a quick shower to wash off the day…I would slip into bed.

Now, this really was just my weekend.  What are your 20′s for – if not to be selfish?

Aside

When I first moved to the city I was pretty much beat over the head with the idea that I would need to change.  I would need tougher skin.  I couldn’t take anything personally.  Smarten up.  Toughen up.

After nearly 8 years in NYC (which counts as about 20 years of life experience) I’ve come to the following conclusion:

 Sometimes taking things personally is important.  

Over the last decade my heart was ripped off my sleeve and thrown into a high security vault.  This may not even be true – my emotional vacation may have started long before moving to NY.  I seem to dwell on this subject for the sake of my own personal improvement – though it seems many other people suffer from the same trials and tribulations (or at least I can only imagine as so many people I meet may be best described using Vanilla Ice lyrics).  Nobody, and I mean nobody, is breaking into the safe place I like to think I put my feelings.  Or aren’t they?

It has come to the point where my lines are indistinguishable.  When am I in the vault?  When is my combo written on the wall for everyone to see?  Do I pass out my personal information because I’m ready for a fight, or am I just ready to let you in?  Sometimes I can’t even tell myself.  Maybe I’ll never know.

A few kind words really touched me today – more of a two-step-backwards shove really.  This really made me think.  I want to make other people feel the way I am feeling right now.  How do I do it?  Crack the vault, be honest, be present, and always be the very best version of myself that I can be in every moment.  Believe it or not – you and I, we are enough.

Don’t be yourself, Be someone a little nicer. M.McLaughlin